Grey Rock Method for Neutralizing Social Predators’ Crazy Making
Have you ever found yourself in a whirlwind of emotional chaos, at the mercy of someone who seems to feed off drama and manipulation? I’ve been both the Crisis King and the unsuspecting victim, and it’s exhausting. But there’s a strategy designed to diffuse such tensions—the grey rock method. This communication technique is our shield […]
Understanding and Breaking Free from a Trauma Bond
Social predators capture hearts via an insidious process known as trauma bonding… …in which the predator develops an intimate psychological bond with its prey. This bond is formed through a cycle of alternating abuse and affection, leaving the victim feeling trapped and unable to break free. It goes beyond the typical dynamics of a toxic […]
Overcoming Resentment of Abuse
Whether a romantic relationship, a friendship, or a professional encounter, being targeted by a social predator can taint your existence. One of the most common emotions experienced by survivors is resentment. Today, I will attempt to walk you through that resentment. We will discuss its depth, impact, and strategies to overcome it. Resentment will run […]
Betrayed by a Psychopath. “What just happened?”
The betrayal of a romantic partner, a friend, or a family member is one of life’s most devastating events. It may leave you vulnerable and emotionally scarred, but please don’t give up hope. When the shock of the truth tears you apart, leaving the soft parts of you exposed and prone to further hurt, informing […]
How to Identify and Protect Yourself from Social Predators
In today’s post, I’ll restate principles from professors Robert Hare and Martha Stout and personal protection expert Gavin de Becker. I can’t say it enough: the quality of your life—or even life itself—depends on recognizing and protecting yourself from social predators. These individuals have less-than-zero conscience and will stop at nothing to impose their will […]
Reconciling Reality and Nightmare: Understanding Cognitive Dissonance in Abusive Relationships
Photo by KELLEPICS on Pixabay Dealing with a predatory life partner can be a life-stopper. The shock and denial accompanying your dawning realization are the stuff of nightmares—more genteelly known as ‘cognitive dissonance.’ In this post, we will explore the concept of cognitive dissonance and its role in abusive relationships. I describe the signs […]
Escaping the Victim Mentality: Pathway to Triumph
Photo by geralt on Pixabay A victim mentality is a pervasive, negative mindset that can be deeply ingrained in a person’s psyche. It can stem from past experiences of trauma, betrayal, or any form of victimization, resulting in feelings of powerlessness, helplessness, and a belief that one is at the mercy of external factors. Inflicting […]
Stay Safe When Leaving an abusive relationship
If you live with an abuser, please don’t give up hope that you can and will escape, physically and emotionally. As impossible as it may seem, if you continue to believe and try, you will find a way. There is help available. But a word of caution: get as much of that help as possible […]
More on Trauma Recovery
If you suffer from a social predator’s abuse, I urge you to find someone to talk to. Seek out people who are sympathetic to your suffering but allow you to reveal and heal at your own pace. Here’s a link to Finding a Therapist Who Can Help You Heal. It’s a great article from HelpGuide.org, […]
Users, Abusers, Liars, Cheaters, Thieves, Manipulators, and Violent Assault
The banner on my home page proclaims, among other things: “Getting Away From Users, Abusers, Liars, Cheaters, Thieves, Manipulators, and Violent Assault.” Unfortunately, there is no simple set of rules for complete avoidance. However, you can better your chances of identifying the bad actors by carefully watching for instances of: —those who treat others with […]